How to use an old trick from psychiatrists to get people to trust you at work

0 0 Tuesday, January 7, 2020 Edit this post

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There's a common misconception that trust can only be built over time, but psychological research suggests otherwise.

In "Friend and Foe," authors Maurice Schweitzer and Adam Galinsky wrote that there's a trick to gain trust quickly — by being credible yet approachable.
The Pratfall Effect in psychology is the increase or decrease of someone's likability after making a mistake. The authors wrote that showing small flaws, like spilling your coffee or dropping a pencil, are some ways to make yourself more approachable to others.
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There's a common misconception that trust is something that builds gradually — that the only person you could possibly reveal personal information to is a close friend or family member you've known for years.

And yet, one of the most important nuggets in "Friend and Foe," a 2015 book by the Wharton professor Maurice Schweitzer and Columbia Business School professor Adam Galinsky, debunks that idea. Both psychology experts suggest that there's a somewhat scientific formula to gaining people's trust quickly.

The key is to simply strike a balance between warmth and competence — so that you seem credible but also human.

How it works: Establish your credibility, then be vulnerable

This idea is based on a 1966 study led by Elliot Aronson, a professor emeritus at UC Santa Cruz. He and other researchers found that "pratfalls," or minor screw-ups, could increase people's appeal. In the study, male college students listened to tape recordings of people supposedly trying out for the college Quiz Bowl team; some candidates seemed highly impressive, while others seemed less so.

In some cases, the candidate spilled a cup of coffee all over themselves. Results showed that students liked the impressive candidates better than the less impressive candidates — but they liked the impressive candidates even more when they spilled their coffee.

To illustrate how this theory works in the real world, the authors use the example of psychiatrists, whose job is to get people to open up about their deepest anxieties and insecurities.

One of their former students, a psychiatrist named Tom, would employ one of three tactics when he met a new patient: He'd drop a pencil, tell a bad joke, or spill his coffee.

Presumably, Tom's patients had already been impressed by the diplomas on his wall, which signaled his competence and credibility. Now Tom's goal was to demonstrate some vulnerability and show that he was indeed a fallible human being. That combination of competence and warmth would make him seem more trustworthy. This technique works just as well in the business realm.

The authors cite an example of an American engineer who was working at a company in Japan. The engineer was annoyed that he was continually listed as a visitor in the minutes of the meetings. But after he joined his Japanese coworkers for a night of karaoke, they started listing him like the rest of the staff.

This is a timeless strategy

In a more recent 2017 study, researchers test out the Pratfall effect to see if the psychology theory still applies today. Their study measured people's likeability towards error-free or faulty robots. Each participant witnessed a robot complete a LEGO task following a set of predefined questions — the goal was to analyze the participants' user experience when a robot makes a mistake.

Turns out, people have a more positive impression with faulty behavior even in the case of robots. The error-filled robots were rated as more likeable.

You can fast-track your way to build trust

Schweitzer and Galinksy's takeaway in their book is that highly competent people can make themselves seem more approachable — and more trustworthy — by being a little clumsy or silly. It makes them seem vulnerable and warm.

"The effectiveness of this strategy debunks the common assumption that trust is something that can only be built slowly over time," the authors wrote. "By making yourself vulnerable, it is possible to build trust in less time than it takes to mop up a spilled latte."

The two caveats here are that you must demonstrate credibility before you exhibit vulnerability — otherwise the formula won't work.

Moreover, you can't demonstrate vulnerability in a way that undermines your competence. For example, a surgeon couldn't drop his tools and feign clumsiness.

Bottom line: If you want people to trust you, first impress them with your knowledge and capability, and then show them you're a human being. It's about giving people a full picture of your abilities and personality, and ultimately letting them make the decision about whether to open up to you.

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