- There are a lot of misconceptions surrounding therapy. But it's not for people who are "weak," nor does it have to continue indefinitely — and there are several different forms that it can take.
- You can do therapy online, or even do it over texting. No matter what type you choose, the most important part is finding the right therapist.
- Your therapist can't tell your boss or partner about the embarrassing things you say.
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Misconceptions about mental health and therapy prevent many people from talking to a professional. Although one in four Americans report seeing a counselor during their lifetime, according to a 2018 survey conducted by the Barna group, individuals who seek counseling are most likely to have family members who attend therapy. Those who haven't known anyone who goes to counseling are much less likely to receive treatment.
Individuals who don't have family members attending therapy may not understand the purpose of treatment. Or, they may be skeptical about the effectiveness of therapy.
Clearing up misunderstandings about therapy might encourage more people to talk to someone about their mindset. Here are seven things mental health experts wish everyone knew about therapy:
1. Therapy isn't for the weak minded
No one ever says, "She's weak. That's why she goes to the dentist to get her teeth cleaned." After all, we appreciate people who take care of their teeth.
People don't always get the same respect when they choose to take care of their minds. There's a stigma attached to therapy, and some people still insist that seeing a mental health professional is a sign of weakness.
But the truth is, it takes strength to ask for help. And it takes strength to admit that you don't have all of the answers and want to invest time into improving yourself.
A mental illness, like depression, isn't a sign of weakness any more than a physical illness, like seasonal allergies. While developing mental strength can improve mental health, it doesn't guarantee you won't ever develop an illness.
2. There are many different types of therapy
Many people imagine that therapy involves lying on a couch and talking about emotional injuries from childhood. And while some therapists may want to address old childhood wounds, not all do.
There are many different types of therapy. Some therapists use a solution-focused approach that focuses on how to make things better in the future, regardless of what happened in the past. Others use cognitive behavioral therapy — where they help patients identify and reframe distorted thinking patterns so they can feel better and take more productive actions.
Before signing up with a therapist, you might ask them what type of therapy they use or what types of theoretical frameworks guide their practice. Most of them share this information on their website — and those who don't are often willing to offer short, free phone consultations to provide this information to prospective clients.
3. It's important to find the best therapist for you
What matters more than the type of therapy is whether you found a therapist who is a good fit for you. After all, treatment won't be effective if you don't feel comfortable opening up or trust the treatment your therapist is providing.
According to some research, 93% of people lie to their therapist. Perhaps many of those people lie because they don't feel comfortable telling their therapist the truth.
If you feel as though you and your therapist aren't a good match, you can fire your therapist at any time. And while you may worry that you'll offend your therapist, the truth is that therapists get fired often. They recognize that, for one reason or another, they sometimes just aren't a good match with someone.
4. Online therapy is an option
If sitting in a therapist's office sounds too inconvenient (or perhaps too intense), online therapy is an alternative — and often just as effective — way to get treatment.
Apps like BetterHelp and Talkspace allow you to connect with a licensed mental health professional from your smartphone or desktop. You can exchange text messages or schedule live video sessions.
Most online therapy sites allow for a certain degree of anonymity — you can communicate with a therapist using a nickname. So if your goal is to stay anonymous, this might be a good option for you.
5. Therapy doesn't have to last a long time
Sometimes people imagine themselves "having a shrink" for life. But the truth is, therapists don't usually work with clients indefinitely.
Some therapists use short-term approaches to treatment. Therapy may be completed in fewer than eight sessions.
So if you've got a commitment phobia when it comes to treatment, don't worry. Look for a therapist who uses short-term interventions, and treatment won't last a long time.
6. You don't have to talk about things you don't want to address
People often put off going to therapy because they don't want to address tough topics (like a traumatic event) or a bad habit (like drinking too much).
But, ultimately, you're in charge of what you talk about. Your therapist might encourage you to address specific issues, but you're welcome to say that those topics are off limits. It's up to you.
7. The information you share is confidential
There are some limits to confidentiality. If a therapist thinks your life or someone else's life is in grave danger, they can break confidentiality. They're also mandated reporters of abuse and neglect.
But that embarrassing thing that happened to you won't get back to your boss. And the therapist won't tell your spouse you're having an affair.
If you have questions about confidentiality and the limits of it, then ask. Therapists are happy to explain what information gets revealed to insurance companies or what happens if records get subpoenaed (like in the case of a messy child custody case).
Where to find help
If you’re considering therapy but don’t know how to find someone to talk to, start by approaching your physician. Explain any concerns you have related to your stress, mental health, or current situation.
Depending on your symptoms, your doctor may want to rule out any underlying physical health issues before recommending talk therapy.
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